Pillow Talk
by Butterfingerss
Summary: Being college roommates, Sousuke and Makoto spend the last moments of most days talking to each other. One night, Makoto tells Sousuke that he plans to confess to someone. However, the idea doesn't sit too well with the taller man.
1. Pillow Talk

Pale moonlight streamed in through the open window, painting Sousuke's bed in an eerie white glow. In the shared dormitory room, the soft laughter of two voices could be heard.

From his side of the room, the raven-haired swimmer could see Makoto had his emerald eyes fixed on some indistinct spot on the ceiling. He, himself, propped up by an elbow, was staring at the form of the slightly smaller man on the opposite side of the room.

A pregnant silence fell upon the room, chasing away the last echoes of their conversation. Feeling sleep slowly take hold, Sousuke laid on his back, pulling the covers over his bare shoulders.

As he was settling in, Makoto quickly mumbled something the other didn't quite catch.

"What was that?" Sousuke questioned sleepily, yawning as he shifted to face the brunet.

"I was... thinking of telling someone I like him. Tomorrow." He paused. "What do you think?"

A wave of dread swept over turquoise eyes, washing away any trace of sleep. But dread swiftly gave way to a surge of irrational anger. Unable to mask the tang of irritation in his voice, Sousuke answered with a scowl, sitting back up.

"Why've I never heard of this before? I mean, the past few weeks, you never so much as mentioned a crush or anything."

"I-I just couldn't find the right time to bring it up, I guess," replied the backstroke swimmer, slightly taken aback by the sudden shift in the taller man's disposition.

In his head, Sousuke was roaring in frustration. But on the outside, all he could voice was a simple, "well, who is the mystery guy?" a sliver of annoyance still present in his words.

Unsure whether a straightforward answer would only agitate his friend further, the smaller man cautiously answered, playing with his fingers. "Uhm, you'll find out sooner or later."

A sigh escaped the lips of the butterfly swimmer as he laid back down and his voice returned to its normal flat tone.

"Why do you want to do this?"

Noting Sousuke's regular tone, the smaller man eased up.

"Well, I've had these feelings for a while now and I've been meaning to tell him. But... I realized that I would never be able to do it if I didn't give myself a deadline," he said, half laughing at himself as he ended his sentence.

He let out a deep breath.

"Things have just been going so great and I sometimes feel something more between us, you know? I honestly don't know if I'm putting our friendship on the line here, but I just don't want to live with the 'what if's hanging over me for the rest of my life."

Hearing this, the teal-eyed realized just how much this must mean to the brunet; so much that the normally passive Makoto actually dared to take action and take such a leap of faith. But more than that, he saw how nothing he said could ever sway his friend from this. Thus, Sousuke conceded with a sigh.

"This better not be some prick who's just gonna break your heart in a week. Then I'd have to go hunt this shit down and beat the crap out of him. And I'd honestly rather not go through the trouble."

The smaller man stayed silent, smiling fondly at his overly protective friend.

"So, is he good enough for you?" The butterfly swimmer asked.

Caught off guard by this question, the brunet hesitated before answering. "To be honest, I think he's too good for me..."

Sousuke turned to look into emerald eyes. "Makoto, there is absolutely no one out there too good for you. Nobody is good enough for you."

"You're... Perfect," he thought to himself, turning to face the window to hide the growing shade on his face.

"Well, I think he is. But don't worry about it, Sousuke. I'm sure you'll like him more than you think."

Even though he was staring out the window, Sousuke could feel Makoto smiling warmly at him. His reply came as a simple grunt. And once again, then there was silence.

"Goodnight, Sousuke," said the brunet.

"You too."

The raven-haired heard the covers on the other bed being pulled over the other's muscular frame.

As Makoto slept soundly, on the other side of the room, a fist crumpled the sheets.

"Why can't I just be happy for him?" Sousuke thought with clenched teeth.


	2. Inner Space

Sousuke sat on the edge of the University pool, absently massaging his recuperating shoulder. The sounds of bustling activity about him served well as a curtain of white noise, keeping him from his thoughts.

Unable to sleep much the previous night, he decided to go for an early morning swim. At times like these, he found it was the best way to clear his mind and tire himself out enough to finally get some sleep.

And with that, he rolled out of his sheets as day broke, grabbed his swimming gear and snuck out of the room before the other woke.

Sitting there, hair dripping and water lapping against his shins, he thought about how things were about to change for him, about how he was going to react the moment he was introduced to this guy, how he would feel seeing their arms intertwined, and most of all, how he would now have to shut out his own feelings whenever he looked into those bright, verdant eyes.

He felt a sharp pain and released the hand on his shoulder. A pale impression slowly fading where his fingers clutched a little too roughly, triggered by his earlier thoughts.

He had to will himself to relax. A deep breath, a long, drawn out sigh, and the expression on his brows finally followed.

The silence was short lived, however, as his thoughts slowly wandered back to their exchange last night.

-  
"Why've I never heard of this before? I mean, the past few weeks, you never so much as mentioned a crush or anything."

"I-I just couldn't find the right time to bring it up, I guess."  
-

"There's no right time to break someone's heart!" He yelled in his head, slamming a fist hard on the concrete beneath him.

Though petty, his action caught the attention of a few bystanders. And feeling their eyes on him, he decided it would be best to hit the showers.

As he left the locker room, he found himself arguing with his inner thoughts.

"If Makoto could finally pick up the nerve to do it, why can't I? I owe him as much, right? I mean, he deserves to know. In the same way he tells me everything that goes on in his life."

But at that moment, he caught himself and the cynical part of him emerged.

"But wouldn't this be a little self serving on your part? I mean, what do you expect from him? To come flying into your arms? Or are you just gonna weird him out after he's just hooked himself a boyfriend? And while we're on it, how are you so sure whoever it is will like him back?"

"Because he's Makoto."

And not a single voice in his head could say anything in protest.

It was a Friday morning, and having memorized his roommate's classes, Sousuke knew he was gonna be alone as he turned the key. Maybe he was subconsciously avoiding his roommate, he thought of his actions.

He stared at their shared living space, dropping his bag by the door. Images of awkward situations flashed through his head. He would enter the room to find the brunet and his new boyfriend studying together. Or one night, he would come home late to find this new lover in bed with Makoto. Just cuddling, mind you; his feelings kept him from thinking of his roommate in anything but an angelic light.

At the sight of his teal-blue sheets, it finally dawned on him how exhausted he was. He dropped down on his bed, not even bothering to kick off his trainers, and quickly drifted off to sleep.

The clock read 4:00 P.M. as Sousuke stirred.

Pleasant was not the best word for his rest. Recurring images of his love interest callously walking away flooded his dreams.

He shook his head, trying to rid himself of the remnants of his sleep. As he did, he felt something detach itself from his dark hair. A crumpled note fell on to his pillow. He realized he must've missed it earlier, distracted by his exhaustion.

The note read:  
"Hey. Dinner tonight at that Italian bistro on the other side of campus?

\- Makoto"


End file.
